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Having sex is a big step. It's important that you feel in control and make decisions that are right for you. You may want to get advice from someone you trust. If you are thinking about having sex, talk to your doctor or a family planning clinic about contraception and sexually transmissible infections (STIs).
The law makes rules about sex and sexual touching. It says that any sexual touching without your agreement is unlawful. It also sets age limits for having sex. The age limits are designed to protect you from exploitation (being taken advantage of) from older people.
The law applies to sexual penetration, which includes anything that involves a penis touching a vagina, anus or mouth. It also includes putting an object or a part of the body into contact with a vagina or anus. The law also applies to touching a person in a sexual way, like touching another person’s vagina, penis, anus or breasts.
The law in Victoria says if you are:
An older person can be charged with a sexual offence if they perform a sexual act that breaks these age limits, even if you agree to it. No adult can have an ongoing sexual relationship with you if you are under 16, unless they are legally married to you.
As well as the age limits, the law says that two people can’t have sex unless they both agree (consent). If you don’t agree and someone threatens you or touches you sexually they are breaking the law. If someone has sex with you or touches you sexually when you are asleep, unconscious or so affected by alcohol or drugs that you are not able to agree, it is still sexual assault.
Having sex with someone in your family, like your brother, sister, mother, uncle, father or grandfather is called incest.
Incest is illegal whether you consent or not, and no matter how young or old you are. It is still incest even if a person is not related to you by blood but is a close family member, like your stepfather. You also can’t have a sexual relationship with a de facto partner of your father or mother while you are under 18.
If you take photos or video of a person under 18 involved in sexual activity or posing in an indecent sexual manner (or who looks like they are) you could be charged with producing child pornography.
If you go onto the internet and download pornography showing people under 18 you could be charged with possessing child pornography.
If you put a pornographic photo or video on the internet, print a photo, or email it to a friend, you could be charged with publishing or transmitting child pornography.
You could be charged even if you are the same age or younger than the person in the picture or video.
People found guilty of sexual offences or child pornography are stopped from working or volunteering with children – for example, as a teacher or a sports coach – or volunteering with youth groups.
Sexual assault: the law, your rights as a victim
Victoria Legal Aid’s (VLA) has a Youth Legal Service that provides legal information and assistance to children, young people and parents.
Call VLA’s Legal Information Service for free information over the phone about the law and how we can help you with your legal problem. You can speak to a legal information officer in English or ask for an interpreter. Phone (03) 9269 0120 or 1800 677 402 (country callers), Monday to Friday from 8.45 am to 5.15 pm.
VLA’s free legal services include:
For some matters we can provide you with a lawyer to help you run your case.
To find out more about any of our legal services see What we do.
The Domestic Violence Resource Centre (DVRC) assists people who have experienced abuse. See the DVRC website (new window) for information about their services and links to ‘When love hurts’ – a website for young people about relationships, respect and abuse – and ‘Bursting the bubble’ – a website for young people about family violence and what you can do if you’re being abused by a family member.
The youthcentral website (new window) has information about relationships, sexuality and young people.